Never Talk to a Stranger
by Aquillas
Summary: What could happen with a 16-year-old that searches for his hero, Sakata Gintoki? It's not like Kabukichou is full of weird and stupid(read: annoying brats, terrorists and even stupider cops) people, right? [Hashida Kanshichirou, post-canon]


_**Never talk to a stranger, even if they seem innocent; they might shoot you with a knife**_

A red-light district is always supposed to be awake; and the Kabuki District is no exception. Even after years of Amanto suppression, the rule of the 4 Devas and the presence of a silver-haired lazy protagonist along with a really violent Amanto girl, a pair of glasses and the rest of the ragtag bunch of misfits (which, by the way, is formed of ninja-stalkers, violent cabaret-girls, stupid cops and so many more), Kabukichou holds its reputation, being a home for all kinds of people and aliens, existing for everyone.

Early in the morning, people were minding their own business, running their shops or being customers. However, a sixteen years old silver-haired boy was silently walking among them; keeping his hand on a wooden sword. Hashida Kanshichirou came today here to make his dream come true: he was going to meet his hero, Sakata Gintoki. He heard so much about him, how he saved his mother and re-established the relation between her and his grandfather. He already knew the man worked in a place named "Yorozuya" and it was located in some place in Kabuki District. How hard can it be to find it? Unfortunately for Kanshichirou, he was for the first time in this district and he heard a lot of weird things about it. But today, it wouldn't matter – it was the best occasion to meet Sakata-san and two yakuza or three wouldn't keep him away.

Lost in his thoughts, he barely registered two children bumping into him. He heard a whispered "sorry" and the two ran away. However, three bulky men were running after them.

_Should I help them? They were just two children, there's no way they can get rid of those pests! What would Sakata-san do? Of course he'd help them! Just like he helped me!_

Looking around, Kanshichirou could see the three men cornering the two children. He couldn't see them very well, but he heard what those thugs said.

"You two seem pretty wealthy… Why don't you share something with us too?" one of the men said. The others snickered in the background. "Didn't your mommy teach you to share?"

It was the perfect occasion to strike. Gripping his bokuto, Kanshichirou hit the first man in his head, making him fall. The other two turned around to see what happened, but one of them screamed. A little girl was behind him and his left leg was bleeding from a kunai. _Wait, a what? A kunai? Did that child actually stabbed that guy? What kinds of children are living in this town? Did they actually need my help? _The teenager couldn't believe his eyes. But he didn't have too much to think, as he saw a Justaway rolling under the remaining guy's legs.

"Nee-chan, this is our chance!" the little guy yelled.

The last thing Kanshichirou registered in the mess was someone grabbing his hand. When he opened his eyes, he was on the ground, with the two children near him. The three men were scattered and burnt and were yelling for their mothers.

"Hey, onii-san! Thank you very much for saving us!" the little boy captured the teenager's attention. That boy had straight blonde hair -way better than his perm, he noted- , along with a crimson pair of eyes. He was dressed in a blue haori, along with a grey pair of hakama. No wonder those scum targeted him, he looked pretty wealthy.

"I didn't really save you, you were the ones that made the explosion." the silver-haired boy replied.

"If you hadn't distracted them, we wouldn't have been able to do that."

This time, it was the girl that spoke. Kanshichirou turned to see her, but he froze the second he saw her. The little girl was some kind of gender bend of him: the perm, even if it had some tingles of blue (and it was longer than his) and the dead-fish eyes – even if her orbs were a beautiful shade of purple. She was dressed in a red flowerily kimono with an orange obi and a nice kanzashi in her hair. She would look like a refined little lady if she wasn't picking the snot out of her nose.

"Oi, Tarou, I didn't know that bastard had another child besides us!" she yelled to her brother.

"Don't say that, Akiko-chan. I'm sure this is only a coincidence…" he turned to the teen, "I'm really sorry for my sister's bluntness, she meant no harm."

"Don't worry about it. I'm also surprised to see someone like her. But I'm pretty sure your father isn't involved with me in anyway – my father is dead." he replied.

The two children just stared at him. It was already awkward, but this silence was making it worse.

"So… What are you doing in Kabukichou? I haven't seen you around before." Akiko asked him.

"This is my first time here. And I'm looking for a hero!" Kanshichirou replied.

"I don't know if you'll find any hero around… But I'm the princess here, so I can give you the honor to walk around with me."

"We can help you around. Kabukichou can be really confusing for a newbie." said Tarou.

"Our prices are between 1000 and 2000 yen. But you helped us, so I'll give you the former."

"Please ignore what Akiko-chan said."

"Shut up, Dia! I'll give you 300 yen if you support me!"

"Please don't use that name, Akiko-chan. And stop copying father's catchphrases, it's weird."

"I'm not copying anyone's catchphrases! I can do my own catchphrases. What a drag, believe it!"

"Akiko-chan, you're still doing it… At least, keep yourself in Gintama. Please don't go in other animes, we might get sued…"

Kanshichirou was long forgotten by the two. He just looked at the two bickering but decided to catch their attention to tell them that he was leaving. After all, he came here with a mission and he had no time to lose.

"Uhh, guys…" he said.

Tarou turned his head. "Oh, nii-san!"

"What?" Akiko butted in.

"Well, I think I should leave. You know how to find your way home, right?" Kanshichirou replied.

"Wait! At least tell us your name." Tarou said.

"I'm Hashida Kanshichirou. I assume you are Akiko and Tarou, right?"

"Yes, I'm Akiko, the almighty princess of the Kabuki District. And he's my twin brother, Tarou, who's only reason to live is trying to steal Megane-kun's place of tsukkomi."

"I'm not trying to steal Shinpachi-nii-san's place of straight man! It's just that you're so unreasonable that I have to take care of you!"

"I'm not unreasonable, you're just too boring. At least, Pattsuan-kun has his glasses to mark his existence. What do you have, huh?"

The silver-haired teenager was getting fed up with those two's argument. He was supposed to watch two brats yelling at each other. "Well, I'm leaving. See you around."

"Please don't leave us alone!" yelled Akiko. "Mum is in Yoshiwara and that lazy-ass of a father is losing our money in a pachinko parlor. Please, Kanshichirou-kun, I don't want to go home!" she faked a sob.

"What are you saying, Akiko-ch…" she smacked her twin brother before he could finish his sentence.

"Your situation doesn't seem very good… I'm sorry for you, guys. Well, I guess you can tag along with me."

_It's not like they're going to do any harm, right?_

"Thank you, Kanshichirou-kun! You're the best!" Akiko hugged him, wiping her teary eyes.

"Don't worry about it. So… Where are we going first?" the teenager asked them.

"Aren't you looking for a hero? I don't know what kind of hero you're searching, but we can look around. I think we can start in the park." replied Tarou.

"Sure. Lead me around."

It didn't take them much to reach the park. The weather was just perfect for a walk. The trio walked around, but the only things they could see were nothing special: robotic dogs, yakuza with their dogs and normal stuff like that. However, there was a lone man sitting on a bench.

"Oi, Madao!" yelled Akiko.

"Oh, it's you… Can't I have a moment to relax myself? Why are you always here?" replied the maru de dame na ousan.

"We're sorry, Hasegawa-san. We're just looking for someone." Tarou replied.

"Hey, Madao… Did they fire you from the taxi job too?"

"I don't know. Author-san doesn't know how my arc will end in Gintama (or if I'll have another arc) and she isn't sure if I should be a Madao for the rest of my life or if I should have a job and live happily with Hatsu. I prefer the latter, though."

"It wouldn't be Gintama without you as a Madao. Please stay as a Madao for the rest of your life."

"Don't say it, it isn't nice! I don't want to be a Madao! I want to stay with my Hatsu for the rest of my life!"

"Why? To do *** and ****?"

"Stop spouting these kinds of things, little girl! Who learnt you that?"

"That would be father." Tarou intervened in their conversation. "We're ignoring Kanshichirou-san, please stop it. If you have nothing to say to us, Hasegawa-san, then we'll leave."

"Well, I don't think I can help you. I doubt there are heroes in this rotten place." He replied. "Oh, tell your father that I'm waiting him at pachinko parlor tomorrow!"

"He's already there!" yelled Akiko.

"Please stop yelling, Akiko-chan."

The trio bid their goodbyes and continued their walk. They continued to look around, but, beside some Musashi playing kick-the-can, there was nothing special.

"We're not really good at that." sighed Tarou. "Do you have any clues on how this hero looks like?"

"Classic shonen hero, I guess." replied the teenager. "He saved me and my mother when I was an infant. He was so strong. My mum told me he beat one of my grandpa's best swordsmen only with a bokuto like the one I have."

"Oh, he sounds so cool! Maybe he can teach me the Kamehameha! And the Twin Dragon Shot! Just image, maybe I'm getting a Bankai! One like Senbonzakura! Or maybe one that can throw Rasengans! I'll wipe everyone's asses with this!"

"Akiko-chan, I'm sure you won't find someone with these powers. After all, this is Gintama."

"You're just jealous, because you'd only get some lame-ass power like the power of friendship. I bet your zanpakuto wouldn't even have a Bankai!"

"You're wrong, Akiko-chan! Of course I'd have a Bankai! It would be a cool one, like Kazeshini! And Chidori is way better than Rasengan!"

It was the third time they forgot about Kanshichirou. "You won't get any power upgrade if we don't find him. You can also go on a training course after we part."

_Boom!_

It was another explosion. _Are all of this district's people pyromaniacs?_ For the second time, the silver-haired teenager found himself confused by the mess, only to realize that something grabbed him and was giving him a piggy ride. He waited for the smoke to clear, but he saw only white. Moving his head, he realized that the white came from the thing that held him, not from the smoke. _What? Is that… a duck?_

A placard was shoved into his face: "_I'm a Renho_."

"Can you read my mind? Let me go!" Kanshichirou was completely flabbergasted by that duck (_Renho_, sorry). He tried to escape, but its hold was stronger.

"Elizabeth means no harm, please stop kicking her!" it was another voice, coming from someone that was in front of them.

"Are… Are you Kaworu Nagisa?" Everything was becoming more confusing for Kanshichirou.

"It's not Kaworu Nagisa, it's Katsura!" the voice replied.

"Kanshichirou-kun, why didn't you ask if Madao was Gendo Ikari? Because he was!" this time, it was Akiko.

Kanshichirou adjusted himself to see better. In front of him was as a tall, black-haired man (_where did he get that hair, is he a woman?_) holding the twins in his arms. He was currently running, even if they were already out of the explosion area.

"Uhh, sir, why …" he tried to ask.

"It's not sir, it's Katsura!"

"Yeah… K-Katsura-san, why are we still running?"

"It's because Shinsengumi are still after us! We can't let them catch us!"

"Shinsengumi? Shinsengumi as in Shinsengumi the police force? Ahh, I did nothing to deserve that! Grandpa is going to disown me! I'll never meet my hero! Why?"

Tarou could sense the worring in Kanshichirou's voice. "They're not after us, Kanshichirou-san. They're only chasing Katsura-san. He is actually a Joui patriot, but don't worry about it, he's our friend."

"Oi, Zura! Why don't you buy a car or something? Are you trying to be an athlete?" It was Akiko the one that jumped into conversation.

"It's not Zura, it's Katsura. And I wouldn't spend Joui's money on such things when we can keep our bodies healthy from running. Right, Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth was holding a placard: "_Please buy a car, Katsura-san._"

Katsura sighed. He looked around and assured himself that the Shinsengumi weren't there anymore.

"I think we're fine." He put the children on the ground and motioned to Elizabeth to do the same. "Sorry I've dragged you with me. Next time I'm paying for your soba at Hokuto Shinken!" he turned to Kanshichirou. "I hope you'll be around too, Tarou and Akiko's friend."

"Don't worry about it, Katsura-san." replied Tarou.

"Also, tell your father that I know his patriot spirit hasn't died yet and I'm still waiting him to join the Joui with me. Remember, Joui is Joy!" And with that, the terrorist and his duck companion left them.

_What kinds of friends do these children have? A Joui patriot? And their lazy-ass alcoholic pachinko-obsessed father was one of them too? I'm feeling so bad for them, but I'm feeling worse for me. Why did I get dragged into this? I just wanted to meet Sakata Gintoki, that's all…_

His moment of meditation was suddenly interrupted by sirens. He could hear a car's brakes behind him and when he turned around, there was a Shinsengumi patrol car at few centimeters from him.

"Didn't your mum teach you not to interfere with police patrols? I'm going to get you arrested for that." someone dead-panned.

The owner of the voice was a sandy haired man with red eyes, sporting a sadistic look. It was enough to frighten Kanshichirou, but then he saw that the man held a bazooka and a pair of cuffs. What did poor Hashida Kanshichirou to deserve that?

"Oi, Sougo, leave him alone!" it was the other man from the car.

"He's my catch, Hijikata-san. Can't you catch your own criminals? Please die, Hijikata-san."

"Like hell I'd die, Sougo!" he turned to Kanshichirou "Don't mind him, this is just his sadist way of being. Here, take some mayonnaise. It's going to calm you down from the shock."

The silver-haired teen just stared as Hijikata put a bottle of mayonnaise in his hand.

"Oi, Mayora! Don't poison him!" it was Akiko, again. It seemed she had a thing with butting in people's conversations.

"What are you doing here, brat?" Sougo threw her a terrifying glare which made Kanshichirou freeze again. But the girl was unmoved, picking her snot and wiping it on the policeman's uniform.

"This guy… " she pointed to Kanshichirou "… is with me. Stop messing with him, it won't work."

"Really, brat? Bet you I can mess with him and you won't do anything to me."

"You stand no chance against me, Prince of Planet Sadist. I'm the Princess of Kabukichou and you're in my territory. You're going to lose at your own game, stupid."

"Sadism is everywhere. Even in your father's warm futon. I rule everywhere; everyone bends down to me and becomes an M. I reached a state where I can be considered the Truth of Sadism. I am "the world". Or perhaps "the universe". I am "God". I am "Truth". I am "all". What can you do?"

"Akiko-chan, Okita-san, please stop! We're getting nowhere!" Like always, Tarou tried to calm down the spirits.

"I don't know why you bother with them, child. You should just go home." Hijikata said to him.

"Oi, don't pick on my brother, Mayora!"

"What a despicable thing to do, Hijikata-san. You shouldn't pick on helpless children. Please commit seppuku, Hijikata-san. I'll help you." He looked to Akiko. "I'll give you five parfaits if you help me assassinate him."

"Deal." The girl snickered. "If you give me ten, I might convince Kagura-nee to join us."

"I have my own ways to convince China, you know…"

"Like doing ***? Or ****? Or do you like to *** and *****? With ****? And ****? "

"Yes and wait, who taught you the magnificent of the S&M play, brat?"

"I heard them from the bastard. And Sacchan was nice enough to explain them all."

"Remind me to tell Danna that he shouldn't tell such things around you."

"I'm used to it. And if you don't give me another 15 parfaits, I'll tell Kagura-nee what you said about doing S&M things to her!"

"Are you trying to blackmail me, brat?"

"Kagura-nee would do anything for me."

"Seven parfaits."

"Ten."

"Deal."

While the two continued to indulge in their sadistic plans, the other three kept staring at them, trying to forget what they just heard. Hijikata kept muttering something that sounded like _how could these two sadists find each other? _

"I think ignoring you it's becoming a running gag in this fiction, Kanshichirou-san."

"I'm already used to it, Tarou-kun."

Hijikata took a cigarette and lit it. "Hey, you silver-haired child. Did you see a long haired terrorist around? Sougo insisted he took a glimpse of him and raced around like the idiot he is."

"Well, I…"

Tarou interrupted him. "No, he didn't. He was with us the entire time. We're sorry we're unable to help you, Hijikata-san."

_Is he covering for Katsura-san? Is he really doing that? How can a little boy lie to a policeman like this?_

"Fine. Well, we should continue patrolling. Please take your sister so I can get Sougo."

"Sure, Hijikata-san. Hey, Akiko-chan! It's getting pretty late; Kanshichirou-san has to go home!"

"Right when I was having fun. Well, I hope I'll never see you again, Prince Sadist."

"You just hurt this policeman's feelings, stupid brat."

"Sougo, get in the car." yelled Hijikata.

"I won't pilot the EVA, Hijikata-san."

"Damn, Sougo, stop it!"

The two Shinsengumi bid their goodbyes and got into the car. They left into the opposite direction of Katsura's route. However, Sougo kept saying that he was sure he saw Katsura. After he argued enough with Toshiro about that, he decided to ask another question that was bothering him.

"Hey, Hijikata-san. Don't you think that silver-haired boy looked like Danna?"

"I don't even want to think about it."

Kanshichirou was the first to react after the car left.

"I guess it is late… Hey, do you want to come for a meal at my home?"

"We appreciate your concern, Kanshichirou-san, but we aren't supposed to …"

Akiko kicked Tarou in the shin and the poor boy felt on the ground from the pain.

"Do you have good food? We're definitely coming!"

"We'll have to walk for a while. Can your brother do that?"

"It's no problem!" she said, while picking Tarou from the ground, despise his protests.

The sunset was already falling over Edo. While Kabukichou seemed to wake even further, in other districts, people were already preparing to go to their homes. After walking for a half an hour, the three children were in front of a pretty big compound. They could hear some noises from the inside, but Kanshichirou just entered and invited the twins in. Unlike the suspicious air he sported when he was outside, now he seemed completely relaxed and in his element. He was greeting some people and stopped when he saw a woman in a purple kimono.

"Kanshichirou-kun, where have you been today?" Then she saw the two children. "Who are you? Ah, you're so cute! Kanshichirou-kun, are they your friends?"

The teenager came near his mother and whispered in her ear. "They helped me in Kabukichou. They have a good-for-nothing father that spends their money and a mother that's a courtesan. I thought I could at least bring them of a real mean. What do you think?"

Ofusa gasped and whispered back to him "How awful! Poor children!" The twins were staring at her, so she quickly replied "Sure thing! Come here, you two! What are your names?"

"Konbanwa! I'm Tarou-kun." replied Tarou, bowing.

"Hi. I'm the Akiko-sama, the Princess of Kabukichou." replied Akiko, picking her nose.

"I am Ofusa, Kanshichirou-kun's mum. Come in, Tarou-kun, Akiko-chan. I have a warm kotatsu right here. We were already ready for the dinner."

Tarou positioned himself in Akiko's left and Kanshichirou's right. Ofusa was across him, setting the pot of nabe in the middle of the kotatsu. The warm was engulfing them and the unmistakably smell of good food was invading their nostrils.

"I really appreciate that you're so nice with us, Ofusa-san. But I don't think you should waste this delicious food on us."

Akiko looked confused at Tarou. She knew he was overly polite –like Megane-kun taught him to be - , but that was too much, even for him. Then, it stuck her. _He has been playing the good child all the day! He's trying to get all the food! How could he predict this situation? They won't even consider him anything else that an innocent being! Damn, he fooled me here! But I won't let him win! This is my game! _

"Tarou is right. We're not worthy of such good food. I don't even think we can appreciate the taste of such expensive and exotic dish. We only live with egg-on-rice and that's enough for us." She faked a sob.

_She realized! Is she trying to compete with me?_ "I think my sister is actually really hungry, she can take my part." _I have father's and Shinpachi-nii-san's blessings with me! I won't let you win!_

_Too bad, Tarou! You realized I'm in, but it's too late! You're already in my strings!_ "Don't even think about it, Tarou-kun! I can't eat while you're watching! Please stop being to considerate!"

"It's enough food for everyone, don't worry. Personally, I have no appetite tonight. You can take my part. Kanshichirou-kun, aren't you full too? I think I should give them your part too!"

"But, mother…"

"No buts! These poor children are so young, still they live such hardships! Here, eat this!"

Ofusa prepared four bowls of Nikujaga and put them in front of the twins. They both took the bowls and tasted the contest. _What… What is this magic taste? Is it the famous beef meat? Can it be? Is it … Kobe?_

Kanshichirou stared at two while they happily munched all the food.

"I'm full. Thank you, Ofusa-san. We're grateful."

"I'll never forget this meal!"

The pot was empty. It was Kanshichirou's time to play his cards.

"Mum, I think it's not healthy to go to sleep with your stomach empty. Our guests are already full, why don't you bring the crab for us_?" You're 100 years to early to engage in a fight with me at this game!_

"Of course not, Kanshichirou-kun! We can't eat in front of them!" Ofusa chided him.

_How could you betray me? My own mother! _The brats were smirking at him. _Next time, I'll be prepared!_

"Don't you want to stay with us tonight? It's already evening and you shouldn't be on street now."

"Mother will be worried for us if we don't go home, so we'll pass this opportunity." replied Tarou.

"I'll bring them back to Kabuki District, mum."

"I can call a car for you, Kanshichirou-kun."

"Don't worry; those children are good enough to beat half of Kabukichou for me, mum."

Ofusa looked at the three and nodded. "Well, then. Just hurry up when you come home." She prepared to leave the room when she remembered something. "Wait a second, please. I have something for you."

Few moments later, she returned with two bentos and gave them to the twins.

"Kanshichirou-kun mentioned about the crab and I'm sure you'll enjoy it tomorrow. Please accept the gift!"

Kanshichirou looked at Tarou, who gave him a malicious glare along with a big smirk. He was silently giggling.

_How could he predict this? What is this brat? He even took Kanimiso-hime!_

"Well, take care of you!"

By the time they left the compound, it was already night. However, this was Kabukichou's "day". The fuss was even bigger than in the middle of the day and Kanshichirou wondered what kind of weirdos he'd see. He was mindlessly following Tarou and Akiko. All the buildings around him were full of colourful lights and noisy. His attention was drawn to one of them. It had a pink entrance sign inscribed with "Snack Smile". It seemed like a hostess bar.

"I never thought it would be so hard to find Sakata Gintoki…" he muttered.

"What did you said?" asked Tarou.

"I said that I never thought it would be so hard to find the person I've been looking for."

"You know, we never asked for his name. Do you know it?"

"It's Sakata Gintoki."

The twins suddenly stopped and looked at him. Akiko kept face-palming herself, while Tarou looked like the most disappointed person ever.

"What? Do you actually know him?"

The two children didn't have the time to reply, when another loud sound invaded their ears.

"Really, I'm sick of explosions!"

But this time, it wasn't an explosion. It was a man that flew through the Snack Smile entrance. However, it wasn't any man. When Kanshichirou saw him, he froze. It was _him_. The white yukata worn improperly, the perm, the bokuto, the dead-fish eyes – it was Sakata-san! But who was that strong to throw him into air? The teenager put his hand on his own bokuto and prepared to jump in order to help Gintoki when the twins stopped him.

A woman exited from Snack Smile. She was holding a naginata and had the most terrifying smile Kanshichirou has even seen (except, maybe, Captain Okita's). The brunette woman was petite and the teenager couldn't understand how this woman was on par with the renowned Sakata Gintoki.

"Are you stupid, Gin-san? How could you let two children to wander around the whole day? How could you, Gin-san?" she told to him.

"Are you going to help me, Tae? I need to find them before Tsukuyo comes home or I'm skewered! You should appreciate I came to ask for your help! I'll even give you 300 yen if you accept!" Gintoki argued desperately.

He was sprawled on the ground while she kept hitting him with her foot in his face. "You're so irresponsible, Gin-san!"

"Tae-san, please stop! You're knocking him out!" Tarou yelled to the woman.

"Don't stop, Anego! He deserves it!"

"Tarou-kun, Akiko-chan!" Tae hugged the twins. "I was so worried for you two! When Gin-san came and told me that he lost you, I was speechless! The nerve of this man!"

"We just wanted to go out and he said he has to drink his strawberry milk. I really wanted to go outside, so I took Tarou and left." Akiko was faking her sobs again.

"Don't worry, Akiko-chan! Gin-san got what he deserved." She looked at Oryou, who was waiting her at the entrance. "Well, I have to go. I'll tell Shin-chan to bring something tomorrow for you. Goodbye!"

After she left, Tarou knelt down and started to shake the unconscious man.

"Father, please wake up. It's alright, Tae-san left."

However, Akiko kept hitting him in the arm.

"Oi, you heard him! Wake up!"

"Stop hitting me, brat! I'm your father, not your puppet!"

Gintoki used his arms to support himself, but he didn't raise him from the ground. He was sitting on the ground, picking his nose.

"Oi brats, where were you?"

"Looking for you, apparently. But we didn't know that." answered Akiko.

"You're making no sense, Block-chan."

"Don't use that name, you bastard! This guy" she pointed to Kanshichirou, "was looking for you. But he only told us that he looked for a hero, not for a permed lazy-ass."

Gintoki looked at Kanshichirou. "I'm not your father. Whoever told you that is a liar. My only children are Dia-kun and Block-chan. "

"No, Sakata-san! I'm Hashida Kanshichirou! The one you helped in the Infant Strife Arc almost over 400 chapters ago!"

"Are you that brat? But that's impossible! That Kanshichirou was a baby! You're a teenager! A teenager! And I'm only around twenty-****"

"That was 15 years ago, father. Sazae-san retired for this fic, the time actually passed." Tarou corrected him.

"That's impossible! Gintama only works in Sazae-san's timeline!" the samurai sighed. "Well, I guess that's it. I'm glad to see you, Kanshichirou-kun. I promised you to take you to drink next time we were meeting. How old are you?"

"Sixteen, Sakata-san."

"I'm Gin-san. Well, you're not old enough for some sake, but strawberry milk works. Come on; let's find a bench on the park."

He finally stood up and walked to Kanshichirou. Unlike him, the twins didn't move one bit.

"What are you waiting for, brats?"

"We're really tired, father."

"I can't walk anymore, dad. Please carry me!"

"I didn't learn you to be lazy. Come on!"

"We'll share the Kanimiso-hime with you if you carry us." Tarou showed him the bento.

Gintoki rushed to them and positioned himself for a piggy ride. The children climbed on this back, happily.

"This is what I learnt you. Next time, get me some otoro and I'll carry you around all Edo!"

It is a beautiful night. Like they said, a red-light district never sleeps. And Kabukichou is warm and welcome and it reeks of weird people, but Hashida Kanshichirou no longer finds it uncomfortable. He walks around with his hero and drinks strawberry milk and he's so happy that dreams come true when you try enough.

* * *

Tarou(**Tarō太郎**/) means "strong, heroic, masculine". Also, this name is part of the name "Kintaro"(金太郎), a Japanese folklore hero(actually named Sakata Kintoki) and Gintoki's namesake.

Akiko(晶子) comes from "晶", which means "sparkle" and "子", which means child. Also, I got the name from the Japanese poet Akiko Yosano from the late Meiji period.

Tarou spent his time around Shinpachi, while Akiko looks up to Kagura. I have this headcanon that Gintoki's children will be a lot influenced by Shinpachi's and Kagura's behaviour.

References time:

_What a drag _ and _Believe it! _are the catchphrases of Shikamaru Nara and Naruto Uzumaki from Naruto.

The _Kamehameha _and _Twin Dragon Shot _are special attacks from Dragon Ball, while _Rasengan _and _Chidori _ are from Naruto. _Bankais_(Senbonzakura and Kazeshini) are from Bleach.

Akira Ishida is the seiyuu of both Katsura and Kaworu, while Fumihiko Tachiki is the seiyuu of Madao and Gendo Ikari.

_"I am "the world". Or perhaps "the universe". I am "God". I am "Truth". I am "all". " _This is what The Truth from _Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood_ said once to Ed about when he opened the Gate.

"_Sougo, get in the car._" I guess it's obvious this is another reference to _Neon Genesis Evangelion_.

I wasn't sure if it was fine to use both English word and Japanese words, like I did with the _Kabuki District_ and _Kabukichou. _Also, the _father_ and _dad_ difference was supposed to come from _otou-san_ and _otou-chan_ thing.

This is my first fic and I'm more than happy to hear your critique and advice(Personally, I find that action is too rushed, but I tried to represent that chaos atmosphere from Gintama). Thank you for taking you time and I hope you enjoyed reading this!


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